4 Ways ChatGPT Can Help Your Friendships NOW
If you're not sure what to say to a friend, put AI to work
This is a chill reminder that my insanely useful book, MODERN FRIENDSHIP (out June 4th), is available for pre-order. Packed with cutting-edge social science, engaging stories, actionable strategies and engaging exercises that you will actually want to complete, MODERN FRIENDSHIP is a truly groundbreaking guide to navigating the messy world of ambiguous adult friendships. A 14-day Wholehearted Friendship Cleanse is included with the book so you can make impactful changes quickly. If you enjoy this newsletter, I think you’ll enjoy the book too.
Studies show that anxiety can cheat you out of the connections you crave. Not knowing the right words to say can be paralyzing. Stuck.
But what if we had a solution to those hiccups? What if your computer’s browser can help give you a guiding (robot) hand? If you’ve been putting off sending a friend that check in email or text because you’re not sure what to say, let AI help you.
Is it creepy to use ChatGPT to communicate with your friends? I mean, is it any creepier than picking out a card at CVS? You didn’t write the words in that card either. But AI can at least give you a headstart so you don’t spin out over getting the conversation started.
To be clear, I’m not suggesting you outsource conversations for the rest of your life. But if you need a little help knocking out the right words to initiate a conversation, consider using a tool like ChatGPT or Claude. Honestly, it’s like having your own Cyrano de Bergerac. Sometimes even seeing what you’re supposed to say can help jumpstart you into crafting your own personal message.
1. Write check-in emails
Prompt I used: “Write a friendly text asking a friend to get lunch”
Here’s what AI suggested:
Hey [Friend's Name]!
I hope you're doing well! It's been a while since we caught up, and I'd love to see you. How about we grab some lunch this week? I'm thinking [Name of Restaurant or General Area] around [Preferred Day and Time]. Let me know what works for you, and we can plan it out.
Looking forward to some good food and great company!
Take care, [Your Name]
2. Save face if you’ve dropped the ball
Prompt used: “What should I say to a friend I never replied to?”
Here’s what AI suggested:
Hey [Friend's Name],
I hope you're doing well. I wanted to apologize for not getting back to you earlier. I didn't mean to leave you hanging, and it was my mistake. Life got a bit hectic, but that's no excuse for not keeping in touch. I value our friendship, and I'd like to catch up and make amends. How about we find a time to chat or meet up soon? Let me know what works for you.
Thanks for your understanding, and I look forward to reconnecting.
Take care, [Your Name]
3. Letting your friend know that they’re on your mind
Prompt used: “Let a friend know you care”
Here’s what AI suggested:
Dear [Friend's Name],
I wanted to take a moment to remind you how much you mean to me and how deeply I care about you. Your presence in my life brightens my days, and I want you to know that I'm here for you through thick and thin.
Your happiness and well-being are important to me, and I'll always be ready to lend an ear, offer a helping hand, or simply share a laugh. If you ever need someone to talk to, lean on, or celebrate with, please remember that I'm just a message or a call away.
Life may have its ups and downs, but having you as a friend makes everything better. You are cherished, appreciated, and cared for more than words can express.
Wishing you joy, peace, and all the love in the world.
With warmest regards,
[Your Name]
4. What to say to a friend you've noticed has been distant
Prompt used: “What do you say to a friend you've noticed has been distant?”
Here’s what AI suggested:
Hey [Friend's Name],
I've noticed that we haven't been in touch as much recently, and I just wanted to check in and see how you're doing. I understand that life can get busy and that we all go through different phases, but I care about our friendship, and I miss our interactions.
If there's anything on your mind or if you're going through something, I'm here to listen and support you. No pressure, just know that I value our friendship, and I want to make sure you're okay.
Let's catch up soon, whether it's for a chat, a coffee, or just to hang out. I'm here whenever you're ready, and I respect whatever pace you're comfortable with.
Take care and looking forward to reconnecting,
[Your Name]
What do you think about using ChatGPT to help with your friendships? Is this something you’d consider doing? Tell me.
Yours in friendship,
Anna Goldfarb
The Friendship Explainer
I seldom struggle with in person conversation, but fall apart when trying to write a thank you note to a friend. My written correspondence comes off formal and cold. ChatGPT has helped me incorporate specific information and tone into a message when my mind has gone blank.
Scripts make a good jump-off point. Sure, ChatGPT’s texts lack a bit of warmth but after it’s done the legwork, the user could easily tweak it.